The Promise of a New Day

It is almost 9:00am on a beautiful Saturday morning in Mishawaka, Indiana. I, like my wife, love the fall and it is so nice to be in a place where it still exists. Having lived the entirety of our married life in places that see nary a fallen leaf, it is delicious to awaken to the sun shining through the trees as they turn a brilliant golden-orange color. We got to bed pretty late last night, but while it is Em's belly that is preventing her from getting the sleep she needs, for me it is nothing more than force of habit; and something I am continually cautioned about. It is amazing to know that there is someone that cares for you so much that they want what is best for you more than you do. I love my wife.

Though Em has been quite diligent at keeping an online record of the events of our pregnancy, mine 'till now has been strictly limited to my personal journals. You remember what those are, right? Think of a blog, but one that no one else can see and that you need Elmer's glue to post pictures in.

Anywho, it is time for me to break the silence and type a few thoughts pertaining to life and the first-time father-to-be. As the bellyfish continues to grow, I continue to find myself in a state of curiosity. I was speaking to this guy who looks just like Dwight Schrute at work yesterday, who's partner is expecting a baby at the same time as we are. All he could talk about was how nervous he was. I have to say I have never felt that with this baby. When we started our conception plans, I remember very distinctly feeling some of that, but it was mostly just the anxiety of making sure the baby would live through the first trimester. I just want to know what this person looks like, and what she is going to be.

When I was a missionary I was exposed to a good measure of child neglect. It made me completely sick to see the innocence of these children destroyed by the attitudes of their repulsive parents. So many little kids that deserve the world are continually beaten down and turned into slugs simply because those who are supposed to protect them are selfish. The more I see it, the more I want to be sure that this one is someone remarkable. Come on, it's a beautiful world! There is so much fun to be had! I look back on the life I have lead, and though I have made my share of mistakes, I really love my history!

I want this baby to love her history! As it draws closer, I have been getting little whisperings of the Spirit, telling me what to expect and prepare for. As I was driving to work, I felt very secure that her mommy and she will have a beautiful relationship. Em is so awesome, the more I am around her, the more I really just dig being on this journey with her. It is so inspiring to know that this child will be half of her; and kinda scary that it will be half of me. I really need to make sure that I don't let work get in the way of being her daddy, because I really let it get in the way of way too much.

The baby is starting to show us her personality. She has some double-kick chops I will be sure to exploit later on (come on, there needs to be more female drummers in this world than Sheila E!) When we read the Scriptures or Harry Potter to her, she pays attention and squirms around a lot. Her activity is telling me that she is anxious to get out and get started! I am known around my office as a guy that gets up and gets it done. "Pick it up and put it in your pocket!" is my latest catch phrase. I think this little bunny rabbit is going to be like that; the kind of person that will just take a hold of something and run with it.

With all that the Prophets have said time and again about the nature of this generation, I really want to make sure she lives up to that without being a drill sargent. Over the past several months, I have been seeing The Lord's way in continually blessing us and preparing us for the baby's arrival, and yet proving us at the same time. Yet, I am continually amazed that when something is needed, it is provided. I am really excited that General Conference is
this weekend, I really need it right now.

So, from this post you can see why it is that I normally keep my random and wandering thoughts confined to the pages of my many journals. I may not be the best of all bloggers, but I am grateful for the power that lies in personal records (and trust me, with the attention-deficit-laden nature of my mind, there IS power in it!) Nephi and Moses were great bloggers, but somehow I don't think "The Blog of Mormon" or "The Blog of Exodus" have as much power as their real titles!